Milestones

Being a parent has filled me with tremendous pride.  Watching my small babies, grow into toddlers, and young kids is a joy to watch.  With each passing milestone I am of course proud and want to impart this on my kids.  I am a firm believer that showing your children how proud of them you are helps create healthy kids.  That is the exact thing that has recently made me have to come up with creative ways to impart this on each of my 3 kids.

As my 4 year old recently was cast into a commercial, my wife and I were ecstatic that he would have a great start to a college/small business fund.  Drew had a blast and I am sure that my other two children had to notice how excited we were for him.  Not wanting to make the others feel left out we tried hard to insure them that we thought they were special and spend some quality time with both Sean and Eva.

Not even a few weeks later my wife and I started potty training our 2.5 year old.  Sean was a different experience than Drew, but sure enough 3 days in we were over the moon to see that Sean was really picking up on it.  To start, Drew was just as excited as us and "helped" my wife and I with Sean, but just like with Drew a few weeks prior, I am sure that Eva and Drew were taking notice of all the attention Sean was getting.  Soon Drew was announcing his successful escapades in the bathroom and seeking the same praise.

Eva for her part is at a stage of life where hitting milestones comes a tad bit more frequently.  The boys are far more used to this, and seem to celebrate the joy of watching a young sibling grow.  I think given her age and the fact that she is a girl and they are boys, the competition hasn't quite set in.

My wife and I have spent a lot of energy trying to teach our children the importance of working together and celebrating each person's accomplishments.  We have expressed that no matter how often, we will be excited and proud of our kids endlessly as they grow, that praise for one will not mean less praise for them later. The fact that we all accomplish things our own way and in our own time is a far harder lesson to teach to young children.

Milestones with one child is a no brainer, with only one child's feelings to think about and praise, the worry that another child would feel slighted is non-existent, but it was a surprise to me to realize that mutual sharing in joy is not just a concept that adults can struggle with but kids as young as 2 struggle with as well.  Hopefully I can impart this lesson on my kids and they will understand there parents have an endless amount of praise to give to our children, love is not a limited commodity we give out.